I'm overweight. Some would call me fat, technically even obese but I don't use those words. One- they're too negative and two- they imply my self-esteem is largely tied to my weight. While it gets the better of me sometimes, I try not to let that happen. Without sounding cocky, I have a pretty face and take time with my appearance to ensure I look my best.
I made some major lifestyle changes about 6 years ago. I was unemployed and looking for work. In addition to job searching, I made taking better care of myself a priority. I used a calorie counting website, took up walking and biking with regularity, made healthy substitutions (whole wheat pasta versus white), and so on. I definitely allowed myself to splurge. I would still eat out, but have lemonade or water instead of pop, check the calories of dishes at my favorite restaurants before leaving the house so I had healthier options in mind when I arrived, and so on. I ate dessert on special occasions. I never went hungry.
Lord Voldemort (no sense naming my ex husband and he definitely tried to destroy my spirit, so it's quite fitting) complained. Constantly. Why are you making two kinds of pasta (I'd serve white to him and the step-kiddo)? Can't you just eat smaller portions of what we're eating? Why are you always logging your calories and exercise? I was doing what worked for me. Did I mention Lord Voldemort is also obese? And wasn't trying to lose weight at the time.
The griping got to me and when I returned to work it was nearly impossible to motivate myself to keep it going. I had lost 30 pounds and dropped two sizes. I looked and felt TERRIFIC. Within 3 months, I'd put most of it back on. I was working at a desk job I hated (the only 6 months in my professional career where I wasn't at a parish or non-for-profit), was fighting with Bellatrix (Lord Voldemort's friend who he later left me for) which was tricky since we worked at the same place, and was being sexually harassed by a creepy coworker. Voldemort kept telling me to suck it up. I let his callous, non-caring attitude destroy my happiness and success. Sigh.
Never again! Especially since the divorce I have been certain to rid my life of any and all toxic relationships. Don't need 'em. Don't have time for 'em. I have blocked so many people on Facebook, stopped returning phone calls of others, and so on. Anyhow, that said... I have completed my first year of this new job and become relatively settled in my new surroundings. This is MY TIME.
A friend of mine recently started a business called YogaBabe. She needed volunteers to try her 12-day cleanse, which I eagerly agreed to do. It wasn't a crazy juice fast, but a normal, fresh diet, that helped jump start my weight loss. I had terrific success and dropped 1-2 sizes (depending on what I am wearing!) in that short time. I haven't had pop in weeks. I am eating far more fruits and veggies than ever. I am still learning to balance and incorporate all this, but it's getting there. The yoga routines are still a bit tough for me. I don't have the strength in my feet/ankles, and hands to hold the positions. I know as I continue to lose weight, this will get easier.
I am hoping to lose 10 pounds in the next month. We'll see how I do. Even if I don't meet my next mini goal, I know I am in a much better place to manage my health and not let anyone/anything sabotage me. I am feeling happier, healthier, and more complete than I have in a long time. Life is good, my friends. Life is good.
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